Fiji Water

Gimme a break!

Take water from an industrial plant in the South Pacific, haul it halfway across the globe and sell it to suckers in Europe and America. IT'S JUST WATER! Secret formula: H²0.

Probably some water molecules you drink from the tap have been to Fiji at some point in their careers. How does it make one bit of difference?

It's just an excuse for Europeans and Americans to show how "discriminating" they are—i.e. how much money and resources they can waste.

The marketing machine justifies it like this: Because Fiji is so remote, water there is somehow more pure than the rest of the world. It's a stretch. Life is full of impurities. Even Fiji is full of impurities. My only question is whether the parts-per-billion of these trace elements—present or not present—are enough to realistically impact my health. Yes, certain contaminants in drinking water are known to be bad news, and science has established some standards for safe water systems, but beyond that, the fear of impurities is purely emotional. Fiji is a pretty place (at least in the tourist brochures) so consumer nimrods figure the water there must be better.

No matter what you drink, you're still going to die, probably long before any trace impurities ever catch up with you.

It's another case of the "Charlie the Tuna" phenomenon: people trying to prove they have "good taste" through the ostentatious products they buy.(Also see my commentary on bottled water in Kilroy Cafe #1.)